经典英语幽默故事
在日常繁忙的生活中，也不要忘了放松自己的心情。下面是学习啦小编为大家带来经典英语幽默故事三则，希望大家喜欢!
经典英语幽默故事：主啊为什么是我
A man was wandering around in a field ,
有名男子在田野里徘徊
thinking about how good his wife had been to him and how fortunate he was to have her,
心里想着他的老婆对他有多么好，他多么幸运拥有她。
He asked God,"Why did you make her so kind hearted?"
他问上帝：“你为什么要把她造得这么心地善良?”
The Lord responded,"So you could love her ,my son."
主响应说：“我儿 呀，这样你就会爱她呀。”
"Why did you make her so good looking?"
“你为什么要把她造得这么貌美呢?”
"So you could love her,my son ."
“我儿呀，这样你就会爱她呀。”
"Why did you make her such a good cook?"
“你为什么要把她造成一个很会做饭菜的人呢?”
"So you could love her,my son."
“我儿呀，这样你就会爱她呀。”
The man thought about this.
这名男子想了一下这件事。
Then he said ," I don't mean to seem ungrateful or anything,but,why did you make her so stupid? "
然后他说:“我并不是有意好像我不知好歹，或是什么的,可是，你为什么把她造得这么笨?”
"So she could love you,my son."
“ 我儿呀，这样她就会爱你呀。”
经典英语幽默故事：安然死亡
Helen was on her deathbed ,
海伦躺在她临终的病床上奄奄一息。
with her husband Jack at her side.
她的丈夫陪在她的身旁。
He held her cold hand and tears silently streamed down his face.
他握着她冰冷的手，泪水静静地从他的脸上流下来。
Her pale lip moved. "Jack," she said,"
她苍白的嘴唇颤动着。她说：“杰克，”
Hush," he quickly interrupted, "Don't talk."
他很快就打断说：“嘘，不要说话。”
But she insisted,"Jack,"she said in her tired voice.
但是她坚持要说。她以疲惫的声音说：
"I have to talk.I must confess.”
“杰克，我一定要说。我必须向你坦白。”
"There is nothing to confess,"said the weeping Jack.
满脸泪水的杰克说：“没什么好坦白的。
"It's all right.Everything's all right."
没关系。一切都没事。”
"No,No!I must die in peace.I must confess,Jake ,that I have been unfaithful to you."
“不，不，我必须死得安心。我一定要坦白我对你不忠;红杏出墙。”
Jack stroked her hand .
杰克抚摸着她的手。
"Now ,Helen,don't be concerned.I know all about it," he sobbed.
他啜泣着说：“海伦 ，现在你不要担心了。我全部都知道了。
"Why else would I poison you ?"
“不然我为什幺要毒死你呀?"
经典英语幽默故事：心脏移植
A man has a heart attack and is brought to the hospital ER.
有一名男子患有心赃病，被送往医院急诊室。
The doctor tells him that he will not live unless he has a heart transplant right away.
医生告诉他，除非他立刻接受心脏移植，否则他就活不成。
Another doctor runs into the room and says,
另外一名，医生跑进急诊室说：
"you are in luck,two hearts just became avaible ,so you will get to choose which one you want.One belongs to an attorney and the other to a social worker."
“你真幸运，刚好有两个心脏可移植，所以你要选择你要哪一个心脏。一个是属于律师，另一个是属于社会工作者。”
The man quickly responds,"the attorney's ."
这名男子很快响应说：“律师的。”
The doctor says,"Wait!Don't you want to know a little about them before you make your decision?"
医生说：“等等!你不想在你做决定之前了解一下他们吗?”
The man says,"I already know enough.We all know that social workers are bleeding hearts and theattorney's probably never used his .So I will take attorney's!"
这名男子说：“我已经知道够了。大家都知道社会工作者都是流血的(有同情心的)心脏，而律师的心脏可能从来都不曾用过他的。所以我选择律师的心脏。"