有趣的英语搞笑经典笑话
你眼睛都闭上了
When a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. The conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep, and fearing he might miss his stop, he nudged him and said: "Wake up, sir!"
当一群妇女上车之后，车上的座位全都被占满了。售票员注意到一名男子好象是睡着了，他担心这个人会坐过站，就用肘轻轻地碰了碰他，说：“先生，醒醒!”
"I wasn't asleep," the man answered.“
我没有睡着。”那个男人回答。
"Not asleep? But you had your eyes closed."
“没睡着?可是你眼睛都闭上了呀?”
"I know. I just hate to look at ladies standing up beside me in a crowded car."
“我知道，我只是不愿意看到在拥挤的车上有女士站在我身边而已。”
干净的杯子
joe and fred were helping to build a house in a village. the weather was very warm, there was a lot of dust everywhere, and by half past twelve, they were very thirsty, so they stopped work to have their lunch. they found the nearest small bar, went in and sat down with their sandwiches.
乔和佛瑞德在一个村子里帮忙盖一间房子。天气很暖和，到处都有许多灰尘。12点半的时候，他们觉得非常口渴，便停下来去吃午饭了。他们找到最近的一家酒吧，走进去坐下吃他们的三明治。
good afternoon, gentlemen. what can i get you? the man behind the bar asked.
下午好，先生。你们想要点什么?柜台后面的伺应问道
joe looked at fred and said, beer, i think. yes, a pint of beer each. is that all right for you, fred?
乔看了看佛瑞德说：我想，啤酒吧。好，那就每人一品脱啤酒。这样可以吗，佛瑞德?
yes, that's all right. fred said. then he turned to the man behind the bar and said, and i want it in a clean glass! don't forget that.
好的，可以。佛瑞德说。然后他转过去跟柜台后面的侍应说：我要啤酒装在一个干净的杯子里!别忘了。
the man behind the bar filled the glasses and brought them to joe and fred. then he said. which of you asked for the clean glass?
柜台后面的侍应倒满杯子后，拿给乔和佛瑞德，接着说：刚才哪一位要干净的杯子的?
蘑菇与毒蕈
Younger Scout: How can I tell the difference between a mushroom and a toadstool?
年少的童子军：我怎样才能把蘑菇和毒蕈区别开呢?
Older Scout: Just eat one before you go to bed. If you wake up the next morning, it was a mushroom.
年长的童子军：上床前吃一个。如果你第二天早上醒来，那就是蘑菇。
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