英语搞笑笑话10篇_幽默笑话带翻译阅读
英语搞笑笑话10篇_幽默笑话带翻译阅读
多阅读一些有趣的英语笑话,能激起我们阅读英语的兴趣,从而提高英语的阅读能力,今天学习啦小编在这里为大家分享英语搞笑笑话10篇,欢迎大家阅读!
英语搞笑笑话篇一
An Absent Minded ProfessorA notoriously absentminded professor was one day observed walking along the street with one foot continually in the gutter,the other on the pavement. A pupil meeting him said: “Good evening,professor.How are you? “Well,” answered the professor,“I thought I was all right when I left home,but now I don't know what's the matter with me.I've been limping for the last half hour.”
有一天,人们看见一个有名的心不在焉的老师在路上走,他的一只脚一直踏在街沟里,另一只脚踩在人行道上。 一个碰见他的学生说: “晚安,老师。您怎么了?” “啊,”这位老师回答说:“我想我离开家的时候还挺好的,可是现在我不知道出了什么毛病。我已经一瘸一拐走了半个小时了。”
英语搞笑笑话篇二
It's His FaultBilly and Bobby were small boys.They were brothers,and they often had fights with each other. Last Saturday their mother said to them,“I'm going to cook our lunch now.Go out and play in the garden—and be good.” “Yes,Mummy,” the two boys answered,and they went out. They played in the garden for half an hour,and then Billy ran into the kitchen.“Mummy,” he said,“Bobby's broken a window in Mrs.Allen's house.” Mrs.Allen was one of their neighbors. “He's a bad boy,”his mother said.“How did he break it?” “I threw a stone at him,” Billy answered,“and he quickly moved down.”
比利和波比都是小男孩。他们是兄弟,两人经常打架。 上个星期六,他们的妈妈对他们说:“我现在要做午饭了。去,到花园去玩吧,别淘气。” “是,妈妈,”两个男孩回答,然后他们就出去了。他们在花园里玩了半个小时,然后比利跑进了厨房。“妈妈,”他说:“波比打碎了艾伦太太家的窗玻璃。”艾伦太太是他们的邻居。 “他是个坏孩子,”他的妈妈说。“他是怎么把玻璃打碎的?” “我朝他扔了一块石子,”比利回答:“他赶紧蹲下。”
英语搞笑笑话篇三
Three pastors in the south were having lunch in a diner. One said, You know, since summer started I’ve been having trouble with bats in my loft(阁楼) and attic at church. I’ve tried everything----noise, spray, cats----nothing seems to scare them away.
Another said, Yes, me too. I’ve got hundreds living in my belfry(钟楼) and in the attic. I’ve been had the place fumigated(熏制) , and they still won’t go away.
The third said, I baptized(洗礼) all mine, and made them members of the church...haven’t seen one back since!
三个南部的牧师在一家小餐馆里吃午饭。其中的一个说道:“你们知道吗,自从夏天来临,我的教堂的阁楼和顶楼就被蝙蝠骚扰,我用尽了一切办法----噪音、喷雾、猫----似乎什么都不能把它们赶走。”
另外一位说:“是啊,我也是。在我的钟楼和阁楼也有好几百只。我曾经请人把整个地方用烟熏消毒一遍,它们还是赶不走。”
第三个牧师说:“我为我那里的所有蝙蝠洗礼,让它们成为教会的一员......从此一只也没有再回来过。”
英语搞笑笑话篇四
The mothers of four priests got together and were discussing their sons. "My son is a monsignor," said the first proud woman. "When he enters a room, people say, 'Hello, Monsignor'." The second mother went on, "My son is a bishop. When he enters a room, people say, 'Hello, Your Excellency'."
"My son is a cardinal." continued the next one. "When he enters a room, people say, 'Hello, Your Eminence'.
" The fourth mother thought for a moment. "My son is six-foot-ten and weighs 300 pounds, " she said. "When he enters a room, people say, 'Oh, my God'!"
四位牧师的母亲聚到一起谈论她们的儿子。“我的儿子是个教士,”第一位母亲自豪地说道,“他进入房间,人们都说,‘您好,阁下’。”
第二为母亲说:“我的儿子是位主教。他进入房间,人们都称,‘您好,大人’。” “我的儿子是位红衣主教,”第三位母亲接着说,“他走进房间,人们都说,‘您好,尊敬的主教大人’。”
第四位母亲略思片刻。“我的儿子身高六英尺十,体重三百磅,”她说,“他要是走入房间,人们都说‘哦,我的上帝’!”
英语搞笑笑话篇五
Mr. Henry Beecher entered Plymouth Church one Sunday and found several letters awaiting him. He opened one and found it contained the single word ″Fool″. Quietly and withbecoming seriousness he announced to the congregation the fact in these words:
″I have known many an instance(实例) of a man writing a letter and forgetting to sign his name, but this is the only instance I have ever known of a man signing his name and forgetting to write the letter.″
一个星期天,亨利·比切先生到普利茅斯的教堂去,在那里有他的几封信。他打开其中一封,发现信中只写着“傻瓜”两个字。
他平静而认真地把这件事告诉教友们:“写信时忘了签名的人,我遇到过很多,但只签了名却忘了写信的人,我还是头一次遇到。”