英语笑话大全
民间笑话故事像神话小说等民间文学一样，是广大劳动人民在长期的生产劳动和与自然界作斗争的过程中，以口头形式创作和传承的文学体裁。小编精心收集了爆笑英语小笑话，供大家欣赏学习!
爆笑英语小笑话篇1
Lawyer’s Advice
律师的忠告
A doctor and a lawyer were attending a cocktail party when the doctor was approached by aman who asked advice on how to hanle his ulcer.
有一位医生和一位律师出席一场鸡尾酒会，当时有一名男子走近这位医生询问有关如何处理他的溃疡的忠告。
The doctor mumbled some medical advice,then turned to the lawyer and asked,
这位医生就咕噜咕噜说了一些医疗上的忠告，然后转向这位律师。
"How do you handled the situation when you are asked for advice during a social function?"
并问他：“当你在社交宴会场合中被人询间忠告的时候，你都怎么处理这个情形呢?”
"Just send an account for such advice" replied the lawyer.
这位律师回答说： “就寄出一张听取忠告的账单呀”。
On the next morning the doctor arrived at his surgery and issues the ulcer-stricken man a account.
下一天早上，这位医生来到他的诊疗窒;开出一张五十元账单给这名罹患溃疡的男子。
That afternoon he received a 0 account from the lawyer.
而在那天下午他竟然就收到一张从律师那里寄来的一百元账单。
爆笑英语小笑话篇2
A Materialistic Lawyer
唯物主义的律师
A lawyer opened the door of his BMW,
有一位律师打开他的 BMW 座车车门，
when suddenly a car came along and hit the door,ripping it off completely.
当时刚好有一辆车子突然驶来撞上车门，而且把它完全给扯了下来。
When the police arrived at the scene,the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage tohis precious BMW.
当警察到达现场的时候，这名律师正在对他的昂贵BMW座车所受到的损害，痛苦地抱怨不已。他满腹牢骚的向警察嘀咕说：
"Officer,look what they've done to my BMW",he whined.
“警官，你瞧瞧他们对我的 BMW所干的好事啦!”
"You lawyers are so materialistic,you make me sick!!!"retorted the officer,
这名警官却回嘴说，“ 你们这些律师实在太唯物主义了，你真让我觉得恶心!”
"You're so worried about your stuid BMW that you didn't even notice that your left arm wasripped off!!!"
“你竟然这么担心你一的笨BMW车子，却没注意到你的左手臂被扯断了”
"Oh my God!" replied the lawyer,finally noticing the bloody left shoulder where his arm oncewas,"Where's my Rolex?!"
这名律师最后注意到流着血的左肩膀，也就是他的手臂原先所在之处，他回答说：“哦，我的天哪!我的劳动士手表在哪里呀?”
爆笑英语小笑话篇3
A man walks into a confession booth and says,"I have sinned."
有一个男人走进告解室说：“我犯罪了”。
"What did you do?"asks the priest.
神父 问 ：“你做了什么?”
"I committed a murder."
“我犯了谋杀罪”
The priest says,"take a drink out of the holy cup and you will be forgiven."
神父说：“你喝一口圣杯的圣水，你就得饶恕。”
A man walks into the confession booth and says ,"I have sinned."
有一个男人走进告解室说：“我犯罪了”。
The priest asks him ,"what did you do?"
神父问他： “你做了什么?”
"I robbed six banks."
“我抢了六家银行”
The priest says, "take a drink out of the holy cup and you will be forgiven."
神父说：“你喝一口圣杯的圣水，你就得饶恕。”
Another man walks into the confession booth and says ," I have sinned ."
另一个男人走进告解室说：“我犯罪了”。
" What did you do?" asks the priest,
神父问：“你做了什么?”
"I broke the holy cup."
“我把圣杯打破了”。
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