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英语短篇笑话大全爆笑

时间: 韦彦867 分享

  笑话,顾名思义,是一种通过幽默的文字或图示来达到令人会心一笑或捧腹大笑效果的文学形式。小编精心收集了爆笑短篇英语笑话,供大家欣赏学习!

  爆笑短篇英语笑话篇1

  Helen was on her deathbed ,

  海伦躺在她临终的病床上奄奄一息。

  with her husband Jack at her side.

  她的丈夫陪在她的身旁。

  He held her cold hand and tears silently streamed down his face.

  他握着她冰冷的手,泪水静静地从他的脸上流下来。

  Her pale lip moved. "Jack," she said,"

  她苍白的嘴唇颤动着。她说:“杰克,”

  Hush," he quickly interrupted, "Don't talk."

  他很快就打断说:“嘘,不要说话。”

  But she insisted,"Jack,"she said in her tired voice.

  但是她坚持要说。她以疲惫的声音说:

  "I have to talk.I must confess.”

  “杰克,我一定要说。我必须向你坦白。”

  "There is nothing to confess,"said the weeping Jack.

  满脸泪水的杰克说:“没什么好坦白的。

  "It's all right.Everything's all right."

  没关系。一切都没事。”

  "No,No!I must die in peace.I must confess,Jake ,that I have been unfaithful to you."

  “不,不,我必须死得安心。我一定要坦白我对你不忠;红杏出墙。”

  Jack stroked her hand .

  杰克抚摸着她的手。

  "Now ,Helen,don't be concerned.I know all about it," he sobbed.

  他啜泣着说:“海伦 ,现在你不要担心了。我全部都知道了。

  "Why else would I poison you ?"

  不然我为什幺要毒死你呀?"

  爆笑短篇英语笑话篇2

  Two social workers were walking through a rough part of the city in the evening.

  有两名社会工作者在晚上的时候 走过市区的简陋地方。

  They heard moans and muted cries for help from a back lane.Upon investigation,

  他们听到从后巷传来的求救呻吟声和很小的哭喊声。

  they found a semiconscious man in a pool of blood.

  他们发现有一个意识不清的人躺在血泊之中。

  "Help me,I've been mugged and viciously beaten " he pleaded.

  他在恳求说:“救救我吧,我被人行凶抢劫,还遭到恶意痛打一顿。”

  The two social workers turned and walked away .

  这两名社会工作者转身离去。

  One remarked to her colleague: " You know the person that did this really needs help."

  其中一位向她的同事说:“你知道吧,于下这挡事的火才真 的需要协助呀。”

  爆笑短篇英语笑话篇3

  A young woman went to her doctor complaining of pain .

  有名年轻女子去看医生,怨忿地说着她的病痛。

  "Where are you hurting?"asked the doctor.

  医生问她:“你哪里痛?”

  "You have to help me,I hurt all over",said the woman,

  女子说:“你一定要帮帮我,我全身痛。”

  "What do you mean ,all over ?"asked the doctor,"be a little more specific."

  医生问说:“什么意思呀,全身?讲更明确一点吧”

  The woman toughed her right knee with her index finger and yelled,

  这名女子用她的指碰触右膝,痛得直叫;

  "Ow,that hurts."Then she toughed her left cheek and again yelled,

  “哎唷,那里好痛呀。”然后她碰触左脸颊,又痛得直叫:

  "Ouch!That hurts ,too.”Then she toughed her right earlobe ,

  “哎呀,那里也好痛呀。”然后她碰触右耳垂,她哭喊说:

  "Ow,even THAT hurts ,she cried.

  “哎呀,连那里也好痛呀。”

  The doctor checked her thoughtfull for a moment and told her his diagnosis,"You have a brokenfinger."

  医生体贴地替她检查了一会儿,然后把诊断结果告诉她:“你的手指断了啦。”

  
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