超级好笑的英语笑话精选
超级好笑的英语笑话精选
前苏联著名作家高尔基说过,“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。小编精心收集了超级好笑的英语笑话，供大家欣赏学习!
超级好笑的英语笑话篇1
孩子的观点
A boy was wondering about a photograph in a newspaper. It showed a group of happy and cheering children carrying schoolbags with the caption at the bottom: "On Their Way To School''.
"It must be mistaken, I bet. They must be on their way home after school. I'm sure of this." the boy concluded.
一个小男孩正在看报纸上的一张照片。照片中是一帮孩子背着书包，高高兴兴地走在路上。照片下面一排小字写着：“上学路上”。
小男孩总结说：“我打赌，一定是搞错了。他们肯定是在放学的路上，我肯定。”
超级好笑的英语笑话篇2
I hung him up to dry
Jim and Mary were both patients in a Mental Hospital. One day while they were walking by the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom. Mary promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.
Jim和Mary都是精神病院里的病人。一天，他们沿着医院的游泳池散步，Jim突然跳入泳池的深水区，他沉到了底部。Mary立刻跳下去救他，她潜到水底，把Jim拉了上来。
When the medical director became aware of Mary's heroic act he immediately reviewed her file and called her into his office.
当院长听闻了Mary的英勇行为后，他立刻翻看了她的病历档案,把她叫进了自己的办公室.
"Mary, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you're being discharged because since you were able to jump in and save the life of another patient, I think you've regained2 your senses. The bad news is Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself with his bathrobe belt in the bathroom，he's dead."
“Mary，我有一个好消息和一个坏消息要告诉你。好消息是你能跳入水中救其他病人，这说明你的意识已经恢复了，你可以出院了。坏消息就是，Jim，你救的那个病人，他还是用自己的浴袍带子在浴室上吊自杀了。”
Mary replied, "He didn't hang himself, I hung him up to dry."
Mary说：“他没有自杀，是我把他吊起来好让他晾干。”
超级好笑的英语笑话篇3
What time is it now?
The two boys were camping in the backyard. When they couldn't figure out what time it was, the first boy said to the second, "Start singing very loud."
两个男孩子在后院露营，他们不知道到了晚上几点钟。于是，一个男孩对另外一个说：“我们开始大声唱歌就行了。”
"How will that help?" said the second boy.
“那就会知道时间吗?”第二个男孩问。
"Just do it," insisted the first.
“只管唱吧。”第一个坚持道。
Both boys broke into song, singing at the top of their lungs. Moments later, a neighbor threw open her window and shouted, "Keep it down! Don't you know it's three o'clock in the morning?"
两个孩子开始大声唱歌，过了一会儿，一个邻居打开窗户喊道：“小声点!你们不知道现在是凌晨三点吗?”
超级好笑的英语笑话篇4
哪有人能弯腰弯那么低的啊?
How could anyone stoop so low?
Our manager at the restaurant where I worked was a much beloved, jovial man. But there was one subject you didn't dare discuss in front of him -- his height. Or, should I say, his lack of it. One day, he stormed through the door and announced angrily, "Someone just picked my pocket!" Most of my fellow waitresses and I were speechless, except for the one who blurted out, "How could anyone stoop so low?"
我们的餐厅经理是一位深受大家爱戴，和蔼而又快乐的人。但在他面前有一件事不能提--他的身高。或者，我应该说，他是有点矮!一天，经理怒气冲冲地撞门而入，高声说，
“有人拿了我的钱包!”
我和其她大部女招待都没敢吱声，但有人却蹦出一句话：
“哪有人能弯腰弯那么低的啊”!
超级好笑的英语笑话篇5
吝啬鬼请客
The notorious1 cheap skate finally decided2 to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot."
"Why use my elbow and foot?"
"Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not coming empty-hangded, are you?"
一个出了名的吝啬鬼终于决定要请一次客了。他在向一个朋友解释怎么找到他家时说：“你上到五楼，找中间那个门，然后用你的胳膊肘按门铃。门开了之后，再用你的脚把门推开。”
“为什么要用我的肘和脚呢?”
“你的双手得拿礼物啊。天哪，你总不会空着手来吧?”吝啬鬼回答。
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