托福写作—你的例子举好了吗
相信很多烤鸭们在托福独立写作中,都喜欢举例子,具体怎么样使用才能拿高分……下面小编给大家带来托福写作—你的例子举好了吗?来学习一下!
托福写作—你的例子举好了吗?
从小,语文老师都会教导我们,例子可以使我们想要表达的观点或者要阐述的概念更加生动形象,以使得观点更加地具有说服力。而且针对托福写作来讲,ETS考官比较青睐例证比较好的文章。一般来讲,在托福的独立写作当中,我们常用的例子包括两种,第一种就是假设一个一般化的例子,通过假设一个场景来说明问题,而这种例子的写法一般比较适合比较大的一些话题,比如“Do you agree or disagreewith the following statement? Landneeds to be used to meet human need rather than to protect endangered animals.”。另一种例子是去描述特别具体的某个人或者某一件事情,这种例子一般比较适合与我们的生活,工作和学习紧密相关的话题。比如“Do you agree or disagreewith the following statement ? Keeping old friends is more important thanmaking new friends.”;今天我们就来展示怎样把这两种例子写好。
一、假设性的例子
假设性的例子有两点好处。其一就是别人不会怀疑我们写的这个例子的真实性,二就是假设性的例子其实是analytic example,这种伴随着分析的例子其实要更符合托福独立写作的风格,更能够体现一个学生的分析能力与水平,毕竟议论文的特点就是分析和证明。
Topic:Do you agree or disagree with the followingstatement? Land needs to be used to meet human need rather than to protectendangered animals.
Position:Protect endangered animals
Reason:Anotherimportant reason to protect endangered animals is that the delicate ecologicalbalance of an area might be irreparably harmed by their extinction.
Exemplification:For example,if humans chop down forests and use the land to grow corn, they mightsimultaneously destroy the habitats of a kind of bird that eats locusts. Thenext year because the locust population can grow unchecked, locusts mightdestroy the entire nearby corn crop. Not only do the birds lose their homes,but humans are also harmed. The ecological balance of many natural habitats isstill not well understood and humans interfere in it at their peril.
通过这一段,大家可以看到假设性的例子的威力。整段文章不长,例子也不多,但是却非常有效地证明了段首的观点即保护生态平衡的重要性。所以,文章不一定要写很多,但是一定要写好,永远不要忘了,独立写作的灵魂和核心就是去证明一个观点的合理性和说服力,所以你用的手段很重要。
二、具体的例子
Topic: Do youagree or disagree with the following statement? The students in universityshould not do any part-time jobs.
Position: Disagree
Reason:Doing part-time jobs can intensify our social ability.
Exemplification:Take myselffor example. When I was a fresh man,I found it really hard to get along with people around me . Then Iwas advised to take a job as a waiter in the restaurant during which I had chancesto communicate with different customers, making them satisfied with my “smile” service. After a year, I myself can realize that I have becomemore outgoing and understanding.
写一个很具体例子的时候同学们要注意几个问题:
1、不要写得特别长,写太多就变成了记叙文,而我们的独立写作是议论文体;
2、这种例子一定要和说理分析性的内容结合在一起才能够支撑起来一个主体段。
托福独立写作高分小技巧:Rhetorical Questions
如果说参加托福考试时在综合写作中还可以适当使用“模板”的话,那么独立写作里“模板”的使用往往会被并标以“pre-prepared”,因此考生想通过这种“捷径”提高得分的结果不会特别理想。独立写作提高得分的关键还是“实力说话”。
尽管“模板”效果有限,但短期提高得分的技巧还是很多,如活用“万能理由”和巧用“论证方法”等。本文主要介绍在独立写作中很多考生没有注意的一个加分“小”技巧—rhetorical question的使用。
在托福写作实战中,rhetorical question的使用能够起到很好的加分作用。为了说明rhetorical question的加分作用,请看托福Official Guide评卷人对一篇题为Dishonesty Kills Reliability的满分作文的点评。下面是点评中关于language的comment:
The writer's language is fluent, accurate, and varied enough to effectively support the progression and connection of ideas. There is a variety of sentence structures, including rhetorical questions.
评卷人把rhetorical questions看做加分点!
从上面的点评中,我们可以清楚的得出这个结论——至少评卷人把上述段落中的反问句视作一种“句型变化”而加以肯定和褒扬。
那么,何谓rhetorical question?Rhetorical question会不会很难?
我们先来看在托福Official Guide里备受评卷人赞誉的rhetorical question实例。在原文第四段中,为了说明honesty的重要性作者是这样写的:
In any relationship of mine, I would wish that first of all, the person I'm dealing with is honest.Even though s/he thinks that s/he did something wrong that I wouldn't like,s/he'd better tell me the truth and not lie about it. Later on if I find out about a lie or hear the truth from someone else, that'd be much more unpleasant. In that case how can I ever believe or trust that person again?How can I ever believe that this person has enough confidence in me to forgive him/her and carry on with the relationship from there.……
提问而不需对方回答,提问只是为了表明并强调作者的立场。这不就是汉语中的“反问”吗?维基百科对反问句的定义是:
A rhetorical question is a figure of speech in the form of a question thatis asked to make a point rather than to elicit an answer. Though a rhetorical question does not require a direct answer, in many cases it may beintended to start a discussion or at least draw an acknowledgement that thelistener understands the intended message.
还有学者对反问的定义更加清楚:
A rhetorical question is asked just for effect or to lay emphasison some point discussed when no real answer is expected.
那么,rhetorical question为什么能够收到评卷人的赞誉而得到加分?这就要从托福作文的评分标准说起了。托福Official Guide里面对于高分作文的要求(Scoring Rubic)描述如下:
_ffectively addresses the topicand task
_s well organized and well developed, appropriate explanations, exemplifications, and / or details
_isplay Unity, progression, and coherence
_isplay consistent use of language,demonstrating syntactic variety, appropriate word choice, and idiomaticity
从上面的评分标准可以清楚看出,rhetorical question能够帮助我们满足实现评分标准第四条中的“demonstrating syntactic variety”。这也正是官方指南中评卷人的点评。
其实,除了体现“句型变化”,合理使用rhetorical question还能帮助我们满足评分标准第一条的要求“effectively addresses the topic and task”。事实上,rhetorical question不仅能够有效的回应主题,还能强调作者的观点从而获得读者的认同。rhetorical question的这种强调作用最著名的范例可能算是雪莱《西风颂》Ode to the West Wind的结尾了:
“O Wind,If Winter comes,can Spring be far behind?”
另外,问句,尤其是设问的合理使用还能起到很好的衔接作用,也就是评分标准的第三条“Display Unity, progression, and coherence”。因此,有学者把rhetorical question的篇章作用总结如下:
? Emphasize a point
? Persuade powerfully
? Influence subtly
? Provoke thinking
? Help smooth transition
限于篇幅,对这些作用就不一一举例了。顺便说一下,rhetorical question后面的标点并不一定总是question mark,有时也可以是句号或感叹号。
下面,本文作者提供一篇自己写的样文,请大家分析问句在开头、中间和结尾段中的使用。
Some people prefer to ask others for help; others prefer to solve the problem with their own knowledge. Which is your choice?
Such is human nature that everyone longs for happiness in our life. Unfortunately, on the path to pursue happiness, we are likely to face various problems. How to solve them? Should we rely on ourselves to remove the obstacle or turn toothers for a cure?From my perspective, it is more reasonable to ask others for help.
Admittedly, always hinging on others to solve problems might be irrational in some cases. For example, if you ask an acquaintance with whom you haven’t a close tie to lend you a hand, he might be reluctant, because most of us have our own care and concern. Besides,some people are unwilling to shoulder the responsibility for the advice they offer. It’s not a rare case when we ask our friend for advice on what major to choose only to get a reply: “Well, it’s really hard to say. Who knows what your real interest is? Who knows what major will be popular when you graduate?”
In spite of the points mentioned above, I still cling to the idea that we should depend on others for the following reasons.
First of all, asking others for help can save us much valuable time, time that we can use for other purposes. As is known to all, most people in contemporary society are always burdened with endless stress and strain. To be admitted to prestigious universities, schoolchildren have to burn midnight oil to out do their peers in exams; likewise,university students can do nothing but to work against the clock to lend themselves an edge over others in the talent market so that they can land adecent job. Given the quickening pace of life, how can we expect us to remove all the obstacles only by ourselves?
In addition, turning to others for help is an efficient way for us to enlarge our circle of friends. It is not a rare case that friendship might be formed after we ask others for help. Take myself as an example. After helping me find a cure for my personal health problem, one of my colleagues has become my best friend. Now, when in trouble,he also asks for my advice. No wonder some even state that it is an efficient way to find friends by “bothering” others for their help.Sounds surprising?It is a discovery revealed inrecent research conducted by a group of leading experts.
Most importantly, it is the only choice to call for help when the solution to a problem requires expertise. Itis known to all that today’s society differs greatly from what it was before. Even a century ago, most folks could be self-sufficient: they grew grain on their own land and wove cloth on their own looms, which seems unimaginable in modern society. Unlike the “good old days”, modern society is a huge complex machine in which each person can serve only as a tiny part.For example, City dwellers depend on farmers for grain while farmers rely on factory workers for industrial products; in the same way, factory workers may temporarily drown our worries in soap operas shown on the screen while film-makers cannot have a film produced, however talented they might be, without the talents of play wrights,directors, photographers, actors or actresses.
Why not ask others for solution when necessary?Good or bad, this might be the best choice left to us.
托福范文分析:要不要进行太空探索
Some people think governments should spend as much money as possible exploring outer space (for example, traveling to the Moon and other planets). Other people disagree ant think governments should spend this money for our basic needs on Earth. Which of these two opinions do you agree with? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.
Even people born after 1968 can easily name the first man to land on the moon; we have all seen the black and white footage of Neil Armstrong in a space suit taking slow, bounding steps to plant an American flag on the moon’s surface. Now, forty years later, some might suggest that governments should continue exploring outer space, and should even devote a healthy amount of money from their budgets to this end. However, the needs of our world have changed, and we must prioritize our spending accordingly and allocate our financial resources to helping the Earth itself.
When we consider the exploration of outer space that had its heyday in the 1950’s and 1960’s, we must also consider the political factors that were present here on Earth. During the Cold War, countries like the United States and the Soviet Union were interested in displaying their intellectual, scientific and financial resources, and outer space became the arena in which this took place. The ‘‘Space Race’’ culminated in 1968 when the United States landed the first astronauts on the moon. Space exploration was of the extreme interest to ordinary citizens, but was connected to themes of national strength and patriotism.
Now, as we consider whether to continue the exploration of outer space, our world is faced with a different set of circumstances. Governments are less preoccupied with their standing in the world, and more interested in the well-being of those who live in it. The greatest threat to our well-being is our damaged environment, and this is a concern of the entire world. For example, pollution caused by factories in South America might contribute to rising water levels in Bangladesh. Space exploration would require a great outlay of money on equipment, personnel and fuel; instead we must allot our financial resources toward cooperating with other countries to improve the environment and help make life more bearable for our fellow citizens on earth.
In summary, those who were alive during the Age of Exploration of the 1950’s and 1960’s can remember the excitement of that era; the scientific findings of those missions to outer space have provided precious insights into the universe beyond Earth. However, one of the goals of governments pursuing space exploration was to provide a show of strength for their countries. Now, the best way a government can show its strength is to show that it cares for its fellow citizens around the world.
托福写作范文:新建大学
The government has announced that it plans to build a new university. Some people think that your community would be a good place to locate the university. Compare the advantages and disadvantages of establishing a new university in your community. Use specific details in your discussion.
I was fortunate enough to grow up in a small town where the state university is located, and my family’s life was richer as a result of having this university in our midst. Living in a “college town” can have its disadvantages, but I would readily advocate having a new university established in my community.
One of the primary advantages of having a university situated in a community is the economic boost it would enjoy. First and foremost, the community could look forward to the creation of steady jobs, including chefs to cook in the dining room, librarians to catalog books, and gardeners to landscape the grounds. Local restaurants, movie theaters and bookstores would benefit from the spending power of young college students, and new cafes and bars might even spring up.
However, a college town finds itself enriched not just financially but in other, less tangible ways. University life consists not just of academic but of extracurricular pursuits. Professors regularly give lectures on their fields of expertise, from Dostoevsky and Russian literature to American Civil War history, and these lectures are usually open to the public, as are concerts, poetry readings and plays. Especially in a small town, international students provide glimpses into other cultures that would otherwise not be so readily available. In the town where I grew up, a large number of doctoral students came from India with their families. The daughter of one such family eventually became my best friend; her family brought me to local Indian cultural events and I grew to love the culture and now consider Indian food to be practically my native cuisine.
It would be inaccurate, though, to portray a college town as a utopia. It’s an unavoidable fact that some undergraduates consider partying to be central to the college experience, and when such students live off campus in apartments, their lifestyles are likely to cause tension among their neighbors. Longtime residents who relish their communities as peaceful, family-oriented places to live are naturally disturbed when a group of students rent the house next door and create an atmosphere of drinking, parties and loud music at odd hours. There is no easy solution, but communication between the university administration and the community is an essential part of the planning process before the university is established.
When a university is established, it becomes inextricably connected to the community where it is located. Alumni who return, years later, for reunions might have some of their fondest memories away from campus, for example in the coffee shop where they spent hours studying, or at the ice cream shop that was a Friday night destination. Planning and discussion between the administration and the community will always be necessary to reduce conflict, but if given the opportunity to welcome a new university to my community, I would be more than enthusiastic about the prospect.
Eg: Four centuries ago, Christopher Columbus, one of the Italian mariners whom the decline of their own republics had put at the service of the world and of adventure, seeking for Spain a westward passage to the Indies as setoff against the achievements of Portuguese discoverers, lighted on America.
Eg: With these hopes and in this belief I would urge you, laying aside all hindrance, thrusting away all private aims, to devote yourselves unswervingly and unflinchingly to the vigorous and successful prosecution of this war.
托福写作—你的例子举好了吗相关文章:
10.托福独立作文模板经典高分
托福写作—你的例子举好了吗
上一篇:全面解析托福写作的基础构建过程
下一篇:新托福写作如何选用好的例子