托福独立写作怎么开头
很多宝宝不知道托福独立写作怎么开头。下面小编就给大家分享一些方法,快学习吧。
托福独立写作应该避免的四种开头方式
1、废话连篇急煞读者
失败案例:
Topic --Should college students be allowed to get married?
This topic is very interesting. I am very interested in talking about this topic. Because I am also a college student and I am not married……
修改方案:开门见山 直奔主题
In my opinion, it would not be a wise decision to allow college students to get married。
2、观点不明态度暧昧
失败案例:
Topic--Should college students be allowed to get married?
I think this topic is very hard to say. Because I am still very little, only 17, and not married, so this topic is very difficult for me……
3、渐行渐远 离题千里
失败案例:
Topic---It is said that nowadays one can not acquire the qualifications and quality essential to success through university education. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?
I think to success, we must have a lot of important qualities. To have these important qualities, we must learn a lot of things, for example, English, music, and etc. We can learn these qualities from our teachers, our friends and from books. All in all, we can learn from many places。
4、中式英语人见人跪
失败案例:
Topic 1-The happiest moment in your life
In our life, there are always some moments which make your heart flower opened angrily……
Topic 2- The population problem
The population problem is a very big problem. For example, in the city centers of Shanghai, we can always see people mountain people sea there。
Topic3- Is there fairness in today’s business world?
I think in today’s society, there is no fairness in the business world. For example, I always chop when I go out buy things……
Topic 4- The advantage of being a nice person
Being a nice person have many advantage. I believe if a person always does bad things, he will get “baoying”。
托福独立写作:善用提问法,写出好开头
古语云:“有其始者,则已之也难”。托福独立写作亦是如此,写好开头段是冲刺高分的第一步。
ETS官方发布的托福独立写作满分标准第一条中就明确指出:“满分文章必须有效地针对给定话题进行论述(effectively addresses the topic and task)”。结合西方的写作习惯,开头段的构成要素和要完成的基本任务也非常清晰,即需要考生表达观点,树立统领全文的思想主题。
因此常见的开头方式有以下两种:一是开门见山型,即开头段只有1-2句话,清晰、简练地针对给定话题表达观点和态度;二是背景概述型,即开头段中先用1-2句话的篇幅结合给定话题提出背景,对其成因、现象或日常观察等进行描述,再亮明观点。
而文韬老师在多年的教学过程中发现,对于大多数考生来说,这两种开头方式都不实用。
首先开门见山型的开头只适合语言功底扎实,且在正文段中有话可说、能够充分展开论证的考生。对于他们来说,开头简洁有力,就可以把大量的篇幅留给正文段,便于取悦考官,取得高分。但对于大多数考生来说,充分论证、有理有据谈何容易,只写一句话往往是简陋不堪、含混不清,且减少了文章字数。
而背景概述型开头要求既要贴合题目,又要新颖独特、不落俗套。这就需要考生对机经真题烂熟于胸,并在考场上花费大量时间构思,否则就会沦为千篇一律的恶俗开头,导致低分。文韬老师在第一次写作课前收到的学生习作中有八成左右都会用“Today with the development of science and technology”做为开头,甚至很多考生在处理跟科技类题材毫不沾边的话题时,也会使用这个“标准”开头。这种文章极易使考官厌倦,从而降低主观评价、拉低整体分数。
在此文韬老师强烈建议各位时间紧、任务重、且语言运用尚未达到炉火纯青程度的考生,善用提问法、写出好开头。
一、提问法开头的基本框架
提问法开头包括:针对给定话题的提问(1-2句话);表达自己的观点和态度(1-2句话)。例如在处理以下这道关于管理零花钱与培养责任感的机经真题时,可以这样开头:
题目:Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? In order to become financially responsible adults, children should manage their own money at young age.
开头:Many parents are in doubt whether children can control their pocket money at young age? As far as I am concerned, with patient guidance and good suggestions, teenagers should manage their own money and assume responsibility at young age.
二、三类常用的提问词汇
在此,文韬老师提供三大类常用的提问词汇,在语法构造方面非常简单实用,各位考生务必牢记:
第一类:情态动词,例如should, could, might
第二类:why与why not
第三类:be in doubt whether...
例如我们以在文韬老师的写作课上开小差是不对的为话题进行提问:
第一类:Might students doze off or play mobile games in my writing class? From my point of view, no way!
第二类:Why not mind your behavior and pay close attention to the writing course? In my opinion, young students should learn how to control themselves in class.
第三类:I am in doubt whether my students’ attention is diverted for a moment in class? Fortunately, this situation never occur in my writing class.
三、善用提问法
用好提问法要注意以下两点:一是注意替换,考生可以使用词汇替换、变主动句为被动句等技巧对给定话题进行包装和重述,务必做到意思相近,但形式不同,以迎合满分标准中对语言多样性的要求;二是字数不足或表达观点力度不够时,可以针对提问做出多种可能性回答,再亮明自己的观点,但务必注意简洁有力,避免啰嗦。
好的开始是成功的一半。善用提问法可以有效地针对话题表明观点,同时有利于增强表达力度、增加文章字数、使全文整体生动活泼、不落俗套,各位想要冲刺高分的考生务必多多练习,熟练运用。
四句话搞定托福独立写作开头
一般来说,开篇段落的写作可分为两大步骤:
第一步就是用简洁明了的句子对原题目的意思进行同义替换;
第二步是提出自己的观点。
这两大步骤细化起来可以概括为四句话:
第一句,采用同义替换的方式对原题目的意思进行更改,当然是“形变神不变”;
第二句,对题目的意思进行解释
第三句,提出自己的观点;
第四句,概括自己所提出观点的理由,引起下文。
下面我具体用一些客户常犯的毛病题目来解释这个“两大步,四个句子”的具体运用方法。
案例1:误解原意思
Do you agree or disagree: Because people are busy with doing so many things, they can do few things well?
Original:
Some people may hold the view that they are able to do things well even if they are busy with doing so many things simultaneously or during a given period. Although plausible at the first glance, I disagree with the statement. Depending on my own personal experience and personality, I firmly maintain that people can do few things well when they are busy with doing so many things. My arguments of this opinion are listed as follows.
解析:
文章第一句话不是对原题目意思进行解释,而是采用采取了和原意思相反的做法来进行题目诠释;第二句表明自己对误解题目的观点;第三句话对自己的观点进行近一步的解释;第四句一个过渡性的句子。开篇内容安排倒是很好,但是作者犯了误解原题目意思的错误导致后面整个文字都做了无用功。
改后:
When people are engaged in a large extent of work simultaneously, they will not be able to perform all of them perfectly. Just imagine how terrible it will be: too many jobs need to be done by the same person in a given time. Once such a picture appears in my mind, I feel dizzy. To me, it is impossible to do everything well with the limited energy and many others factors .Therefore , I agree with the statement too many things to be done at the same time cause few to be well done . The reasons are as follow.
Revised:
第一句话对原题目意思进行了很好的诠释;第二、三句话进一步解释原题目;第四句话提出自己的观点;第五句话过渡性句子引起下文。
案例2 :语言罗嗦,绕弯子给出自己观点,浪费时间
Some young adults want independence from their parents as soon as possible. Other young adults prefer to live with their families for a longer time. Which of these situations do you think is better? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.
original:
With the development of science and technology, people’s living standard has been improving day by day. According to the family plan, one couple could have only one child. So child becomes the center of the whole family. Some of them are even spoiled. Therefore, I think it is better if the young adult could live independent from their parents as soon as possible.
解析:
这个开头看似没有任何问题,但是仔细分析就会发现很多问题。首先,作者绕了个大弯才给出自己的观点。其次,观点是对原题目的抄写,改动的比较少。最后,开篇缺少引起下文的过渡句。更大的错误是这个开头更像是一个全文主要观点的一个分论点。
Revised:
As we all know, some young adults have the sense of independence in a special period so that they want to choose to live apart from their family, while others still choose to stay with parents in the family. Family can provide young adults a warm bay where he or she could turn to whenever any problems arise. However, considering the sound development of the young adult both mentally and physically, I think to live independently the earlier, the better. Independence is a lesson that each of us must face one day. The detailed reasons are listed below.
解析:
第一句话诠释原题目意思;第二句话进一步解释第一句话;第三句话提出自己的观点;第四句话解释自己的观点,引出下文。
托福写作:攻克独立写作开头段
首先,回顾一下5分作文的评分标准:
? effectively addresses the writing task
? is well organized and well developed
? use clearly appropriate details to support a thesis
? displays consistent facility in the use of language
? demonstrates syntactic variety and appropriate word choice, thoughit may have occasional errors
这三大块的要求(organization, development, language use)对于Introduction的意义在于:1)作文必须有一个开头段(这样才完整呀,就像刚认识一个小伙伴,总要问一下“你的名字是?”) 2)好的开头段要做到引出话题和明确表明作者的态度。(也许问“你的名字”并不是一个搭讪的好方式,那怎么办?)
来个例子吧~ 下文是TPO10的综合写作阅读文章,没错!写作虽然分为两个tasks,但都是英语写作呀~ 笔者一直认为这两篇作文可以一起提高,综合写作就是美国人写的议论分析文章哇~ 接下来,带着大家分析这个开头段,同时解答如下几个问题:
1) 能不能一开始就写“I agree with the statement.”/“I think ….”?
2) 题目里的文字我就抄一点点,一丢丢……就一点点,可以吗?
3) 多少字为宜?
The sea otter is a small mammal that lives in watersalong the western coast of North America from California to Alaska.(看了第一句,能猜出作者观点吗?当然不能,但是我们可以知道这篇文章一定是关于 seaotter 这个话题的。)When some sea otter populations off the Alaskan coaststarted rapidly declining a few years ago, it caused much concern because seaotters play an important ecological role in the coastal ecosystem. Expertsstarted investigating the cause of the decline and quickly realized that there were two possible explanations:environmental pollution or attacks by predators.(两个可能的原因,这是可以被质疑被反驳的“观点”哦) Initially, the pollution hypothesis seemed the morelikely of the two.(作者的态度明显就是支持 pollution hypothesis)
到了答疑时间:
1)第一句话建议大家先引入话题,不要直接简单粗暴地写“我觉得……”。除非,你打字速度慢到担心后面写不完……(这种情况下,XDF老师们也有专门帮大家提高打英文速度的方法哟)
2)背景句一般是一个现象,接下来就要针对这个话题提出一个争论点。大多数时候,考生会在此时选择改写题目。问题来了,5分评分标准中的“demonstrates syntactic variety and appropriate word choice”就需要大家做到表达准确,且不能重复。
3)最后必须给出作者的观点,至于用I think还是In myopinion都不重要,重要的还是这句话整体写的如何。如果有一个短语100%比In my opinion更好,并且100%能拿高分,我想这早就不会是一个秘密了。希望宝宝们注重提高语言能力!而不是机械地背短语。
4)整篇文章字数要求是300以上,个人建议开头段字数在40-60个。(个别打字狂人且脑洞太大的,你想多写一些我也不拦着。)
接下来,轮到宝宝们自己练习啦O(∩_∩)O 30min的时间要好好把握哦!又快又好地创作出开头段,需要更多指导和方法欢迎面谈!很快就又到了new year resolution的时间了,提前祝各位同学能尽快和托福君愉快地分手!
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