幽默爆笑英语小故事五则

幽默爆笑英语小故事五则

　　在繁忙的生活中，也要偶尔放松自己的心情。下面学习啦小编为大家带来幽默爆笑英语小故事五则，欢迎大家阅读!

　　幽默爆笑英语小故事：帮倒忙

　　"I'll need to see your license and registration,"says the highway patrolman after stopping a middle-aged couple."You were speeding.”

　　高速公路上的警察拦住了一对中年夫妇，说:“我要看看你的驾驶证和车证，你超速了.”

　　"But，officer,"says the husband, "I was way under the speed limit.”

　　“可是，长官，我一直在限制以下的速度开车。”大夫说。

　　"Sir, you were doing 63 in a 55 Zone.”

　　“先生，你在限速55英里的地区开到了63英里。”

　　"I was not speeding!"insists the man. 'Your radar gun must be broken. "

　　“我没有超速，”那个人坚特说:“你的雷达扫瞄一定有问题了。”

　　At this point, the wife leans over. "It''s no use arguing with him, officer,"she says apologetically."He always gets this stubborn when he's been drinking."

　　这时，他的老婆凑了上来:“警察先生，你不用跟他争论了，”她带着抱歉的口气说:“每一次喝酒，他就变得这么固执。”

　　幽默爆笑英语小故事：判断失误

　　The owner visits his factory and is shocked to see a man leaning against a wall，drinking coffee, "How much do you make?" he demands.“Eighty dollars a day,“is the reply.The owner hands him and says，“Get out,and don't come back!"

　　工厂的老板下厂来检查，他看见一个人倚着喝咖啡，这使他感到很吃惊。“你一天挣多少钱?"老板问。"80美元一天。”那人回答。老板递给他80美元说;“你走吧，不要再来上班了。”

　　Two minutes later the foreman comes in and asks,"Where's the delivery man who was just here?"

　　两分钟后，工头进来问:“刚才在这儿的邮递员哪儿去了?”

　　幽默爆笑英语小故事：大夫的许诺

　　A guy spots his doctor in the shopping center. He stops and says. "Two months ago when I was in your office， you told me to go home，get into bed and stay there until you called. But you never called. "I didn't?"the doctor says."Then what are you doing out of bed?"

　　一个人在购物中心看见了给他看病的大夫，他叫住了大夫说:“两个月前，我到你办会室去看病，你让我回来躺在床上，等你的电话。但你从来就没打过电话.”

　　大夫说:“我没打过电话吗?那你下床干什么呢?”

　　幽默爆笑英语小故事：健忘小姐

　　My friend Pam has a problem remembering numbers.After moving. she gave out her new phone listing. One.acquairitance tried to call hey but reached a travel agency. The agent said she'd received a lot of calls for Pam. The caller apologized and said she'd try to reach Pam at her office.

　　我的朋友潘，特别不善于记数字。她搬走后，把她的新电话号码给了大家。一个熟人议图给她打电话，结果却打到了旅游局.那里的代理商说，他已替潘接了很多电话。打电话的人道了歉，并说她再往潘的办公室打电话我她。

　　"If you do get hold of her，”the agent replied，"will you tell her that her order is in at Sears?"

　　“如果你能找到她的话，”代理商回答说:“你能告诉她吗?她在希尔斯商店订的货已经到了。”

　　幽默爆笑英语小故事：精确的人

　　The expediter in the office where I worked would buy needed parts for equipment and make a list of the purchases.Then she would give the paperwork to oar boss—a known stickler for details—for his approval. Un April Fool's Day, the expediter and her co-worker turned in a list including a dress and matching shoes. Our boss took one look at this request for reimbursement and shouted for me to call these two people into his office immediately. Fearing that he wasn't going to take their joke well，they quietly went in to see him.”Look，you two，I' m a busy man !“he deadpanned."I need to know what color dress and what size shoes!”

　　在我办公室工作的调配员每次需买设备零件时，总要先列个清单，然后把它交给我们的老板—一位很拘泥细节的人，去批准。在愚人节那天，调配员和她的同事递上一张单子，单子上列了一件上衣和一双跑鞋。我们的老板看了看要钱的单子，然后朝我喊，让我把她们俩马上叫到办奋室来。她们担心老板不欣赏她们所开的玩笑，所以进去后一句话也没说。“瞧你们这俩人，我是个忙人，”老板训斥着:“单子上要把上衣的颜色和靯子的尺码列清楚。”