大学经典英语笑话阅读
大学经典英语笑话阅读
笑话是民族文化不可或缺的一部分。透过笑话我们可以看到一个民族的生存环境、生活方式、社会关系和心理特征等等。本文是大学经典英语笑话，希望对大家有帮助!
大学经典英语笑话：一个鸡蛋
An egg cup of tea to the tea, the results it becomes boiled eggs; have an egg run the Songhua River to swim, the results it becomes egg; have a go with eggs in Shandong, the results become Lu (halogen) eggs; an egg on the homeless, it becomes a wild eggs; there an egg accidentally fell on the road for a cross fell to the ground, turned into a missile; have an egg go to the family yard, and the results into the atomic bomb; have an egg go to the Tibetan Plateau, the results become a hydrogen bomb; an egg on the sick, the results become bad; have an egg married, turned into a jerk; have an egg go to the river swim, the results become a nuclear bomb; have an egg go to the flowers gone, turned into a Hua Dan; have an egg riding a horse, holding a knife, that he is a Peking Opera Blues; have an egg is the mother , the length of the ugly, the result becomes a dinosaur egg; have an egg is male, his wife and the other eggs out adultery, and he became a son of a bitch ... ...
一个鸡蛋去茶馆喝茶，结果它变成了茶叶蛋;有一个鸡蛋跑去松花江游泳，结果它变成了松花蛋;有一有个鸡蛋跑到了山东，结果变成了鲁(卤)蛋;有一个鸡蛋无家可归，结果它变成了野鸡蛋;有一个鸡蛋在路上不小心摔了一交，倒在地上，结果变成了导弹;有一 个鸡蛋跑到人家院子里去了，结果变成了原子弹;有一个鸡蛋跑到青藏高原，结果变成了氢弹;有一个鸡蛋生病了，结果变成了坏蛋;有一个鸡蛋嫁人了，结果变成了混蛋;有一个鸡蛋跑到河里游泳，结果变成了核弹;有一个鸡蛋跑到花丛中去了，结果变成了花旦;有一个 鸡蛋骑着一匹马，拿着一把刀，原来他是刀马旦;有一个鸡蛋是母的，长的很丑，结果就变成了恐龙蛋;有一个鸡蛋是公的，他老婆在外面和别的鸡蛋通奸，结果他变成了王八蛋……
大学经典英语笑话：邮递员
A man walked into a doctor's examining room
一个人走进一家诊所。
A:Put out your tongue.
伸出你的舌头。
B:OK.
好的。
Then he put out his tongue and the doctor looked at it quickly.
于是他伸出舌头，医生很快地看了一下。
A:You can put your tongue back now. It's clear what's wrong with you.You need more exercise.
好吧，把舌头伸回去吧，你的病因很明显，你需要更多的运动。
B:But，doctor, I don't think...
但是，医生，我不认为……
A:Don't tell me what you think，I am the doctor，not you，I know what you need.I see hundreds of people like you.None of them get any exercis e.They sit in offices all day and in front of the television in the evening.What you need is to walk quickly for at least twenty mi-nutes a day.
不要告诉我你认为怎么样，我是医生，不是你。我知道你需要什么。我看过数以百计像你这样的病人。他们没有一个人锻炼过。他们整天坐在办公室里，晚上就坐在电视机前。你所需要的就是每天至少快跑20分钟。
B:Doctor.you don't understand.I...
医生，你不知道，我……
A:I don't want to hear any excuses. You must find time for exercise.If you don't，you will get fat and have health problems when you are o1der.
我不想听任何理由。你应该抽出时间来运动，如果你不锻炼，那么当你老的时候，你就会变得很胖，并且有健康问题。
B:But I walk everyday.
但我每天都走路的。
A:Oh，yes，and I know what kind of walking that is. You walk a few feet from your home to the station，and a few more feet from the sta- lion to your office，and a few more feet fr om your office to a restaurant for much and back. That's not real walking. I'm talking about a walk in the park for twenty minutes every day.
喔，是的。我知道那是一种怎样的散步，你走几英尺的路，从家到火车站，又走几英尺从车站到办公室，然后走几英尺从办公室到餐馆中吃中饭再回来。那不是真正的散步。我所说的是每天在公园中散步20分钟。
B:(Shouting)Will you listen to me. doctor t I am a mailman and I walk for seven hour every day.
(叫喊着)请听我说，医生!我是一名邮递员，我每天得走7小时的路。
A:(Being silent for a moment) Put your tongue out again，will you?
(闷在那里半天不语)再把你的舌头伸出来，行吗?
大学经典英语笑话：A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”
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