大学好笑的英语笑话精选
笑话是内容丰富并具有出乎意料结尾的幽默口头故事。笑话几乎涵盖人们生活的所有领域,其中包括政治笑话、经济笑话、家庭生活笑话、关于民族性格的笑话等。小编精心收集了大学好笑的英语笑话，供大家欣赏学习!
大学好笑的英语笑话：Put your feet in 把脚放进去
The school girl was sitting with her feet streched far out into the aisle, and was busily chewing gum, when the teacher espied her. "Mary!" called the teacher sharply. "Yes, Madam?" questioned the pupil, "Take that gum out of your mouth and put your feet in!"
一个女学生坐在座位上，嘴里起劲地嚼着口香糖，脚却伸到课桌间的走道里，被老师发现了。“玛丽!”老师严厉地叫她。“什么事，老师?”这女学生问。“把口香糖从嘴里拿出来，把脚放进去。”
大学好笑的英语笑话：He's just been to the Zoo
When I was waitting in line at the bank , I noticed a woman holding a small child at one of the windows. The boy was eating a roll, which he thrust at the teller. The teller smiled and shook his head.
"No, no, dear," said the boy's mom, and then, turnning to the teller, "I beg your pardon, young man. Please forgive my son. He's just been to the zoo."
当我在银行里排队时，发现一位妇女抱着一个小孩站在一个窗口。男孩正在吃一个面包卷，并将面包卷戳向出纳员，出纳员笑着摇了摇头。
“别这样，亲爱的，” 男孩的妈妈说。然后她转向出纳员说，“对不起，小伙子。请原谅我的儿子，他刚去过动物园。”
大学好笑的英语笑话：我当时还不缺钱
Looking very unhappy, a poor man entered a doctor's consulting-room.
"Doctor," he said, "you must help me. I swallowed a penny about a month ago."
"Good heavens, man!" said the doctor. "Why have you waited so long? Why don't you come to me on the day you swallowed it?"
"To tell you the truth, Doctor," the poor man replied, "I didn't need the money so badly then."
一个看起来很难受的穷人走进大夫的诊室。
“大夫!”他说，“帮帮我!一个月前我吞了一分硬币!”
“天哪，”大夫说，“早干嘛去了?你当时怎么不来看?”
“实话告诉您吧，大夫，”穷人说，“我当时还不缺钱!”
大学好笑的英语笑话：I am his second wife 我就是他的第二太太
A rich man and his wife went into a shop to buy a bracelet. Neither of them was very young.
They looked at a lot of beautiful bracelets, and after half an hour there were two which they looked like very much, but they had not yet been able to choose between them. One of them was very expensive, and the other was quite a lot cheaper.
Of course, the shopkeeper wanted to sell them the more expensive one, because then he would get more money from them, so he said to the lady, "Oh, go on. Spend his money, if you don't he will only spend it on his second wife." For several seconds nobody said a word, and then the lady said angrily, "I am his second wife."
一位富人和妻子到一家商店买手镯。两人都老大不小了。
他们看了好多漂亮的手镯，选了半个小时，其中有两只看起来相似。但在这两只当中，要哪一只，英语小故事他们仍举棋不定。一只很贵，另一只要便宜得多。
当然，店老板想把贵的卖给他们，因为卖贵的可以从它们手里赚更多的钱。于是，店老板对那位太太说：“哦，就买这只吧，他的钱你就花把。要是你不花，拿钱可能用在第二个太太身上了。”沉默了好几秒钟，这位太太面露不悦地说：“我就是他的第二个太太。”
大学好笑的英语笑话：The Horse can talk 马会说话
man was reading a newspaper at a table, when his wife suddenly came to him and hit him on the back. The man was very surprised and asked: "Why do you hit me?"
The wife answered: "Who is Mary mentioned in the letter in your pocket?"
The man said: "It was the horse in the racecourse, which I chipped in two weeks ago."
Three days later, the man was sitting at the table, and this time his wife beat him angrily. The man asked: "What do you beat me for this time?"
The wife answered: "Your horse gave you a telephone call."
一个男人坐在桌边看报纸，他妻子忽然走到身后，用拳头狠狠地打他，男人摸着脑袋不解地问：“为什么打我?”
妻子回答:”你的口袋里那封信提到的玛丽是谁?”
男人说：“是我两星期前在马场下注的那匹马。”
三天后，男人又在桌边，他妻子这次更气愤地打他。男人问：“这次又为什么?”
妻子回答：“你的马打电话来了。”
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