十万个冷笑话英语版精选

　　冷笑话与传统的笑话不同，有其独特的产生和理解方式。下面是学习啦小编带来的十万个冷笑话英语版，欢迎阅读!

　　十万个冷笑话英语版精选

　　Only One Eye to Settle On

　　The girl found the go-between and said, "You cheated me ! One of his eyes is not true. Why didn't you tell me this before ?"

　　"I have told you. " said the go-between with justice on his side, When you met first, I told you that he settled on you with one eye.

　　Notes:

　　(1) go-between n.媒人

　　(2) settle on选定;决定

　　Exercises:

　　根据短文判断下列句子正(T)、(F)：

　　① The girl was angry with the go-between for having cheated her.

　　② The girl married the one-eyed man.

　　③ The go-between hadn't told the girl the fact.

　　④ The go-between thought that justice was on his side.

　　⑤ The girl hadn't fully understood the go-between's words.

　　112.一眼就看中

　　姑娘找到媒人，说：“你欺骗了我。他的一只眼是假眼，你以前为什么不告诉我?”

　　“怎么没告诉你?”媒人也不甘示弱，“你们第一回见面后，我就说，他一眼就看中你了。”

　　练习参考答案：

　　①T②T③F④T⑤T

　　十万个冷笑话英语版阅读

　　A Short Holiday

　　Alan worked in an office in the city. He worked very hard and really looked forward to his holidays.

　　He usually went to the seaside, but one year he saw an ad in a newspaper "Enjoy country life. Spend a few weeks at Willow Farm. Good food, fresh air, horse riding, walking, fishing. Reasonable prices ."

　　" This sounds like a good idea." he thought, " I' 11 spend a month at Willow Farm. I'll enjoy horse riding, walking and fishing. They'll make a change from sitting by the seaside.

　　Four days later he returned home.

　　"What' s wrong with Willow Farm ?" his friend asked him. " Didn't you enjoy country life ?"

　　"Country life was fine," Alan said." But there was another problem.

　　"Oh, what?"

　　Well, the first day I was there a sheep died, and we had roast lamb for dinner.

　　揊resh meat is the best.擾"I know, but on the second day a cow died, and we had roast beef for dinner. "

　　"Lucky you!"

　　"You don't understand," Alan said." On the third day a pig died and we had roast pork for dinner."

　　" A different roast every day." Jack exclaimed.

　　"Let me finish," Alan said." On the fourth day the farmer died and I didn't dare stay for dinner!"

　　Notes:

　　(1) look forward to期待

　　(2) reasonable adj.合理的

　　Exercises:

　　根据短文选择正确答案：

　　① Where did Alan work?

　　A. on a farm

　　B. in a government

　　C. in a restaurant

　　D. in an office in the city

　　② Where did Alan usually go to spend his holiday?

　　A. the seaside

　　B. the countryside

　　C. the mountains

　　D. an island

　　③ Why did Alan decide to spend his holiday at Willow farm?

　　A. Because he was there.

　　B. Because he had a good friend there.

　　C. Because he thought it would make a change from sitting by the seaside.

　　D. Because he wanted to enjoy the fresh air in the countryside.

　　④ How many days later did he return?

　　A. a few weeks

　　B. a week

　　C. three days

　　D. four days

　　⑤ What made Alan return so soon?

　　A. He felt sick.

　　B. The air there was not fresh.

　　C. The prices were too high.

　　D. They always had the thing that had just died for dinner

　　113.短期假日

　　亚伦在一个城市的公司工作。他十分努力地工作，期望着休假。

　　以前休假，他经常去海边。但有一年，他看到报纸上有一则广告：“领略乡村生活。在唯利屋农场度假数周，可享受：美味佳肴、新鲜空气、骑马、散步、垂钓。价格合理。”

　　“这到是个好主意，”他想，“我要在唯利屋过上一个月，去享受骑马的乐趣，还要去散步、钓鱼。这肯定与坐在海边不同。”

　　四天后，他回来了。

　　“唯利屋发生什么事了?”他的朋友问他，“你不喜欢那里的乡村生活吗?”

　　“乡村生活是很好，”亚伦说，“但是有一个问题。”

　　“什么?”

　　“第一天，一只羊死了。我们的饭是烤羊肉。”

　　“新鲜肉最好。”

　　“我知道，但是第二天，一只牛死了。于是我们吃的是烤牛肉。”

　　“你真是幸运。”

　　“你不知道，”亚伦说，“第三天，一头猪死了。我们就吃烤猪肉。”

　　“每天吃不同的烧烤。”

　　“让我说完，”亚伦说，“第四天，农场主死了。我不敢呆在那里吃饭了。”

　　练习参考答案：

　　①D②A③C④D⑤D

　　十万个冷笑话英语版学习

　　A Womans answer

　　A husband said to his wife, " Why did God create women to be beautiful but foolish?"

　　"Well," his wife answered at once." The reason is very simple. God made us beautiful so men would love us; God made us foolish so we would marry them."

　　Notes:

　　(1) create v.创造

　　(2) foolish adj.愚蠢的

　　Exercises:

　　根据短文回答下列问题：

　　① Who were talking to each other?

　　② What question did the husband raise?

　　③ The wife thought for a while before she answered, didn't she?

　　④ How did the wife think of the reason?

　　⑤ How did she answer the question?

　　114.妇女的回答

　　一位丈夫对他的妻子说：“为什么上帝把妇女创造得如此美丽却又愚蠢呢?”

　　“噢，”他的妻子立刻回答道，“原因很简单。上帝使我们如此美丽，男人才会爱我们。上帝使我们如此愚蠢，我们才会嫁给他们。”

　　练习参考答案：

　　① A husband and his wife.

　　② He asked why God create women to be beautiful but foolish.

　　③ No. She answered at once.

　　④ Very simple.

　　⑤ She said that God made women beautiful so men would love them; God made women foolish so they would men.